Thursday, January 28, 2010

Only In America For A Laugh

For A Laugh

Only in drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while the healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

Only in people order double cheese, large fries, and a diet coke.

Only in banks leave the vault doors open and then chain the pens to the counter.

Only in we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

Only in we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.

Only in they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.


Why the sun lightens our hair and darkens our skin?

Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed?

Why don't you ever see the headline ' Psychic Wins Lottery'?

Why is it that doctors call what they do 'practice'?

Why is lemonade made with artificial flavoring and dish washing liquid is made with real lemons?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called the rush hour?

Why isn't there a mouse- flavored cat food?

Why didn't Moses swat those two mosquitoes?

Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff!?

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

I like this one!!! If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

If flying is so safe why do they call the airport the terminal?

Thanks to Aunt Kat, Bob, and the original writer Tharpsbigandy!!

Thanks for reading on this 28th day of January 2010.


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